"Using everything within me to keep the tears neatly stacked up behind the dam.
The most honest thing I can do is cry.
I want all the flat surfaces in the house to be littered with trinkets you were too nervous to collect all these years. I want your stupid socks in the way of my next step."
..and the description heading to a park in a wealthy neighborhood (and everything about this - the lines and the lines between the lines - the uneven screws you found, hearing "fix it," knowing you can't - and the "deep" part about you 🤦♀️😭😓 - I am 63 and relate to every bit of your incredible writing here.
Oh! and lol at the opening with the remote!!! I finally got a new stupid fire stick after yelling for the 500th time "oh yeah, the off button ALWAYS works! just nothing else!!!"
Also, I'm sorry for your grief 😔 You will grow stronger and you will begin to embrace everything beautiful that you are. Just don't wait as long as I did. oxox
Thank you, Deborah. Thank you for seeing yourself in this piece and thank you for seeing me. A funny opening only seemed appropriate for this mundane and chronic sadness. It's a reminder that all things can exist at once and the presence of a burden isn't the absence of relief. (Ooh, I really like that thought!)
I wish you all the best with your new Fire Stick, may it actually perform its duties haha!
I hope to be forever memorized by how so much can be felt, said and held in a series of word weaved lines.
This, “I realized early on that my emotions run deeper and wider than what society deems appropriate.” is what I have felt for most of my life, and still struggle with accepting most days.
And this, “I am the remote and the show must go on.” is the reminder I needed today. Thank you always for your pourings of tender depth and a kind of honesty that pulls at the heart’s strings.
It's a blessing to offer such a reminder and to connect with you on this piece. Sometimes I question my tone or the possibly over melodramatic lines, but I've found within this uncomfortable honesty also comes the most connection and healing. Thank you!
It's interesting to witness how different pens aspire to define the mysterious emotions of life. Each one contributing to a common canvas with a unique palette of their own spiritual DNA.
It reflects a painting class with one model but the brushes are pens and the paint words.
Each has an occasional mistake that contributed pain or power securing its existence.
Maurissa, this piece of writing is a living breathing diamond that will pierce the heavy veil of grief of untold numbers of others. What a gift you've laid out here for us. I'm truly in awe. Every so often, a writer, for me, comes along and I find, that I dissolve into them and resonate so deeply I feel as if I've known them and they've known me for lifetimes. I'm adding you to that list.
I wonder, if you recognize, the power of what you've delivered here? This is the the warrior cry of the empath on a visceral level thats left me with a physical response, rarely does a piece of writing cause my body to respond physically and when it does, I pay attention.
You are absolutely not alone in this space, I hope you know that, no matter what it may feel like. I at one time, had my One as well, and that became no more and the soul's wail rips through time, space, being and leaves one changed forever, but when we land on the other side of it ~ it can be so far beyond anything we envisioned; the heart's capacity weaved with the soul's tenacity and grace creates divinity if we do, stay true to ourselves, our pain, and most of all, no matter what, never, ever give up. Love always wins. This has been my life and my experience. Thank you for this exquisite window into your world. I hit "subscribe" based on the title alone, "The most honest thing I can do is cry," before I even began to read...
So grateful to have found your work and most of all, your truth❤️🙏
Niki, I am so astounded by your comment and grateful for you being here. Thank you for sharing some of your own experience with me that brought you closer into this piece. To your question, at first and still, I often don't or won't lean into the thought that my work could be powerful to anyone else. How could my small spot of sadness compare to others? The world isn't over... and yet that is my reason. I am here and I so desperately want to be alive, so I can only move through the feeling, whatever it may be. It's often a feeling that's itching to get out and this space has been the best scratcher.
I'm thankful that we have crossed paths and I look forward to sharing many more little moments in the future. You have given me a great deal to think about and sit with. Thank you! 💚
"Using everything within me to keep the tears neatly stacked up behind the dam.
The most honest thing I can do is cry.
I want all the flat surfaces in the house to be littered with trinkets you were too nervous to collect all these years. I want your stupid socks in the way of my next step."
..and the description heading to a park in a wealthy neighborhood (and everything about this - the lines and the lines between the lines - the uneven screws you found, hearing "fix it," knowing you can't - and the "deep" part about you 🤦♀️😭😓 - I am 63 and relate to every bit of your incredible writing here.
Oh! and lol at the opening with the remote!!! I finally got a new stupid fire stick after yelling for the 500th time "oh yeah, the off button ALWAYS works! just nothing else!!!"
Also, I'm sorry for your grief 😔 You will grow stronger and you will begin to embrace everything beautiful that you are. Just don't wait as long as I did. oxox
Thank you, Deborah. Thank you for seeing yourself in this piece and thank you for seeing me. A funny opening only seemed appropriate for this mundane and chronic sadness. It's a reminder that all things can exist at once and the presence of a burden isn't the absence of relief. (Ooh, I really like that thought!)
I wish you all the best with your new Fire Stick, may it actually perform its duties haha!
xx
I'm so sorry for this season of sadness 😓 and oh that thought is amazing! Gotta use it!! 🙌🏻
..and thank you! It's still in the box. I'm afraid of it 🤪
Have a peaceful weekend 😘
It’s okay, I may look back and wish I said none of this but right now this is part of my story. Thank you. 💚
Oh yes, gotta use it!
I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
I had a feeling I would see you here friend, isn't this exquisite?🙏💓
Yesss 🥰✨🙌🏻 Maurissa writes exquisitely! So good to see you here 😘
I hope to be forever memorized by how so much can be felt, said and held in a series of word weaved lines.
This, “I realized early on that my emotions run deeper and wider than what society deems appropriate.” is what I have felt for most of my life, and still struggle with accepting most days.
And this, “I am the remote and the show must go on.” is the reminder I needed today. Thank you always for your pourings of tender depth and a kind of honesty that pulls at the heart’s strings.
It's a blessing to offer such a reminder and to connect with you on this piece. Sometimes I question my tone or the possibly over melodramatic lines, but I've found within this uncomfortable honesty also comes the most connection and healing. Thank you!
Straight to the heart centre, such evocative writing 🙏❤️🩹💝
So kind, Simone, thank you! 💚
It's interesting to witness how different pens aspire to define the mysterious emotions of life. Each one contributing to a common canvas with a unique palette of their own spiritual DNA.
It reflects a painting class with one model but the brushes are pens and the paint words.
Each has an occasional mistake that contributed pain or power securing its existence.
My ‘Angels of the meadow’ is such a work.
God's love and hugs to those of the canvas,
Shall
Thank you for your kind words and thank you for being here.
queen energy
This made me smile. Thank you for being here.
my pleasure, your writing is beautiful!
I appreciate that, thank you!
Maurissa, this piece of writing is a living breathing diamond that will pierce the heavy veil of grief of untold numbers of others. What a gift you've laid out here for us. I'm truly in awe. Every so often, a writer, for me, comes along and I find, that I dissolve into them and resonate so deeply I feel as if I've known them and they've known me for lifetimes. I'm adding you to that list.
I wonder, if you recognize, the power of what you've delivered here? This is the the warrior cry of the empath on a visceral level thats left me with a physical response, rarely does a piece of writing cause my body to respond physically and when it does, I pay attention.
You are absolutely not alone in this space, I hope you know that, no matter what it may feel like. I at one time, had my One as well, and that became no more and the soul's wail rips through time, space, being and leaves one changed forever, but when we land on the other side of it ~ it can be so far beyond anything we envisioned; the heart's capacity weaved with the soul's tenacity and grace creates divinity if we do, stay true to ourselves, our pain, and most of all, no matter what, never, ever give up. Love always wins. This has been my life and my experience. Thank you for this exquisite window into your world. I hit "subscribe" based on the title alone, "The most honest thing I can do is cry," before I even began to read...
So grateful to have found your work and most of all, your truth❤️🙏
Niki, I am so astounded by your comment and grateful for you being here. Thank you for sharing some of your own experience with me that brought you closer into this piece. To your question, at first and still, I often don't or won't lean into the thought that my work could be powerful to anyone else. How could my small spot of sadness compare to others? The world isn't over... and yet that is my reason. I am here and I so desperately want to be alive, so I can only move through the feeling, whatever it may be. It's often a feeling that's itching to get out and this space has been the best scratcher.
I'm thankful that we have crossed paths and I look forward to sharing many more little moments in the future. You have given me a great deal to think about and sit with. Thank you! 💚
Hi Maruissa,
I’m so moved by your response, your openness and your heart. That ripple we create goes out and on forever…I’m so deeply grateful I caught yours💓
I laughed out loud at this opening because I finally bought a new Roku after using the same VERY slow one for 10 years
It's the little things, haha. Oh how it grinds my gears when the volume works but no other buttons! Congrats on your fresh one, enjoy it for awhile!